I have this lump that doesn't want to go away. The people around me wish I'd swallow it but that isn't doable, though i wish i could, then it would remain with me. > Life is precious. Too precious to be taken for granted. Some of us are perhaps more aware of that than others.> > The arrival of new life is celebrated.> When the arrival is fresh, and still remains practically hidden, the celebration is a quiet one. > As its arrival in our world becomes more practically defined and imminent, the celebration and gladness step up a notch.> And when that new life emerges for all to see, the joy is celebrated with fanfare.> > Same with life that leaves this world.> A life that was lived to its fullest and appreciated, is mourned when it leaves. Those around grieve and are given time to absorb their loss.> A life that was lived but only for a short time, is missed when gone. Those who haven't had a chance to get to know it, can easier forget. > A life that was never known, never heard, and parted almost without chance to be celebrated seems to have no chance to be missed.> > Oh, but it is missed.> By those who celebrated its arrival. > By those who cherish the very essence of life.> By those who anticipated this new life for an eternity of time.> By those who breathed their every breath for too short a time sharing it with that life. > By those who yearned to share a lifetime with this new life.> By those who loved its very being.> By those who carried it.> By me.> > Don't tell me not to miss it.> Don't tell me it never lived. > Don't tell me to move on.> > That hurts me.> It denies the existence of the life i carried.> Of the life i yearned for.> Of the life i loved.> > I can accept my loss as it is Hashem who gives and takes. > I can accept my loss as it is Hashem who knows what's best.> I can accept my loss as it is Hashem who decides how and when.> > But you, can you accept my loss?> Can you accept that Hashem gave and took? > Can you accept that Hashem knows what is best?> Hashem decided when to give but then He took it back?> > Acknowledge my loss, help me accept it.> Acknowledge my loss, that will help me absorb it. > Acknowledge my loss, for that's what it is.> > A loss of something precious.> An unknown but bright future.> > Ultimately it's the loss of life giving way for something greater than life. > Hashem's master plan.> > I stand humbled.> And thank you for allowing me to accept His plan with love.